I recently tried my luck on some dating apps after a long hiatus. I'm a mid-20s guy, average looks, good hygiene, dress well, a good job, sociable, etc. Took some time to create a profile that had some nice pictures of me (all were clear photos of just me, and show I have a life outside of work) and wrote a thoughtful bio. The only negative attribute I might have had in regard to the apps is that I'm an ethnic minority.

I kept my expectations low, and swiped on people who I wasn't always physically attracted to, but seemed like they had nice personalities, and pictures don't always accurately represent how someone looks in person. I also avoided swiping right on the hottest women who I knew would not swipe right on me.

And let me tell you, a dentist probably has an easier time pulling teeth than I had attempting to have conversations with these women. I had maybe a eight matches across the apps in a week. Being treated as a disposable option, having to constantly keep the conversation going, and abruptly being ghosted takes a toll on a man's soul.

I have a fulfilling life, good friends and family, and there have been women who I have met in-person who are attracted to me. I know my value as a person and as a partner in a relationship. Nevertheless, I could feel emotions of confusion, anger, and hopelessness bubble up inside of me. A younger man or a man who is less emotionally aware would probably go online and find TRP, the misogynist YouTube gurus, all the social media that validate their emotions, etc.

And how can we expect anything different? There are no other mainstream views as to why dating is currently this way or how to improve. People try to brush it under the rug, saying that guys need to improve themselves, blame men as a gender for making women uncomfortable. I don't believe in the explanations given by TRP or the manosphere guys, nor the mainstream handwaving.

But at a certain point, there has to be some plausible reason given forward by society, right? Or are we destined to a world where dating is completely dysfunctional unless you're highly desired? In a world where people are more and more isolated, what other avenues are there to meet women?

Because at this point, I feel the best course of action for me is just to pursue low-effort hookups rather than a relationship.