Men of PPD, what are your standards? Do you think they are high?

Difficult-Ad-2866 · 2024-06-03T17:25:15+00:00

Men eventually become pragmatic. Their standards fall in line with what they can get. If they’re single, and not having sex, it’s usually not by choice. It’s because his standards are higher than his perceived value. A man knows that he either has to raise his value or lower his standards. As always, there are some exceptions, and some people told talk partners in thinking they have more value than they actually do, but that’s typically how it plays out.

Cheap_Revolution_685 · 2024-06-03T15:02:59+00:00

Not fat
Not a single mother
No big age gap

itsaboutpowerrr · 2024-06-03T11:03:22+00:00

Not a sex worker

Has a job

Younger than 35

Not obese

Not a psycho

Not a single mother

VTHokie2020 · 2024-06-03T14:35:24+00:00

I've been thinking about this lately lol. Anyway:

College educated (preference is in something useful, but virtually any completed accredited education will do)

Not overweight

Not a single mom

Religious is fine, but not waiting until marriage

Okay with moving to a new place (I've met a surprising number of <25 year olds who are dead set on never leaving the region they grew up in)

Doesn't do any drugs harder than alcohol or weed (Ex did happy shrooms occasionally, so idk. I certainly wasn't happy with it though)

~27 & younger? I'm 25, so within a reasonable range. But I don't think I'd discard a 28 year old immediately lol

Honestly that's about it. I would've added intellectual curiosity, but that's a little subjective. I like to talk about current events though lol.

Anyway, those are the binary requirements that I can think of. Other things exist on a spectrum. And yeah, I think these are reasonable, but very rare in the region of the U.S. that I live in.

ComfortableJeans · 2024-06-03T10:53:31+00:00

My one superficial standard is not being fat. That's it.

Other than that, be kind and gentle with me, love animals as much as I do and we have to click.

Having the same sexual standards as me is also there. I don't do casual sex, I've been offered a few times, but the idea of fucking a girl I don't have very strong feelings and connections with is really off putting, and only want one partner. Sex is for relationships.

Height doesn't bother me, I'm 6'3, virtually all girls are shorter than me.
Them being broke doesn't bother me either.
I'm not religious, but I've been in a relationship with a religious girl, as long as you respect it, it's all good.
Never really met a conservitave girl I've clicked with, but if I did, I wouldn't be bothered by it.

Honestly, the hardest part of it all is finding someone you click with. It's really rare.

I think my standards are really low, other than the clicking thing.

thedarkracer · 2024-06-03T10:07:24+00:00

Just someone to vibe with, I guess. Rest I can adjust and I have always adjusted.

Gravel_Roads · 2024-06-03T10:49:21+00:00

I'm an introvert, so my standards are incredibly high. I have to like the other person's company MORE than I like being alone, which is a lot. I'd say I'm only compatible with about 10% of the people I meet, (and of those 10%, not all of them were available to date.)

I need someone who has a lot of frame and humor, and doesn't flinch heavy topics (I work at a shelter, and would like a partner that doesn't go to pieces just hearing me talk about my day.) I need someone who's health conscious, likes to learn and is adventurous about new things. Must be able to fly by the seat of their pants and not break down if plans go awry. Has to have their own life and not rely on me to provide them with their lifetime of stimulation.

Luckily, in return, I'm also really fun and adventurous, so generally I can' find a few people (I'm bi, so I date men and women) willing to come get into mischief with me.

zoxzoxzo · 2024-06-03T11:56:14+00:00

My most basic standards for a girl:

be a genuine and nice person
don't be fat
don't be involved in any type of sex work or adult content creation

I think this is pretty reasonable and achievable for most

DevThaGodfatha · 2024-06-03T15:20:42+00:00

My standards aren’t high at all. I just ask don’t be fat AND ugly.

Sounds harsh but it’s much more fair than you wanna give it credit for at first glance. I’m a slightly huskier guy myself with (what I’ve heard to be) a handsome face (I lean more towards decent personally but I’ve more than heard the former on quite a few occasions, I don’t believe it myself 🤣). I’ve got a muscular frame and build but I could really shave off 40lbs.

Physically , I can work with a lotta body types. Doesn’t matter too much. I blurted out in class how this new girl in class was gorgeous when she walked in , and she was the farthest thing from endowed with a good chest or ass, or meat on her bones at all tbh, she was skinny as fuck. Conversely, up to a certain weight anyways, being fat doesn’t bother me. All I truly have a hard demand for, is that your face be in good condition and have good teeth.

I can’t make love to terrible teeth, nor a face I can’t see myself actually wanting to look at extensively. I just can’t. Sorry. I need everything above the neck to look like you actually give a fuck. And I bring up fat girls cuz honestly, quite a lot of fat women are really pretty. I’m not even saying that in a “damn, if she lost 30lbs she’d be sexy as fuck” type of way , even if it may be true, I’m saying it as in she’s genuinely pretty . Weight we can work on together, hell I break 10k steps every day at work and try to make time for the gym. But I do need your face to look like you care, at the VERY least.

Hard_Corsair · 2024-06-03T17:20:53+00:00

I would like to add a very important criteria that nobody else is likely to mention, and that I wouldn't have thought of when I was younger: "not like Jane Pierce"

-marries young congressman Franklin Pierce

-her only wish is that he'll leave politics for good

-he leaves congress and opens a law firm

-she helps him quit drinking

-she accepts it when he goes off to war

-he didn't even tell her he was going to war

-he comes back with a leg injury, she doesn't mind

-she still stands by her only request of no politics

-but Franklin Pierce wants to be President

-runs a campaign behind her back

-she only finds out when it's announced that he's nominated

-he wins

-son killed in a train accident

-she considers it to be divine punishment

-spends his whole term in mourning

-marriage falls apart

-Franklin goes back to severe alcoholism

-eventually dies miserable

Jane Pierce was essentially a perfect wife other than one giant deal-breaking catch. So, I would say don't accept someone with a bunch of good traits if the bad one is a doozy.

AdEffective7894s · 2024-06-03T15:01:11+00:00

For an incel any standard is high

KorinTowerFreeloader · 2024-06-03T15:20:26+00:00

I am 30, 6ft5, fit, with a full set of hair, and work at a bank. For LTR, I would like someone younger than me, with no history of ONS and situationships, of a healthy weight, and with a decent personality. That's all.

I don't think my standards are high at all.

GH0STRIDER579 · 2024-06-03T15:58:57+00:00

I'm a very active person, and have spent the last 6 years consistently working out and built a fit, athletic, and muscular physique with visible abs and a defined chest and shoulders. In other words, I have a physique that a lot in the red pill crowd seems to idolize, aside from the fact I'm 5'7. If I had to describe what a "perfect" woman, physically, would be according to my personal tastes, I would say I'm attracted to curvy, athletic, and well-endowed women with hourglass figures. However practically, I don't require a partner to perfectly match my physical tastes as long as I'm still attracted to her and want to have a healthy physical connection with her.

I have a very high libido and want to at least physically desire my partner. Beyond looks and physical attraction though, I would say my standards are that she has to be physically attracted to me and actually want me, to be respectful, kind, considerate, have a healthy relationship with her family, and values commitment, monogamy, and has a desire to build a life together beyond just immediate happiness.

Out of my physical preference though, the only parts of them I would actually consider to be standards are that she needs to look out for her health and maintain her appearance in the same way I do. It's not just for looks, but because I'm very active, I'd want to do things like go on walks with my wife/girlfriend, take her out to parks or to explore monuments and attractions together, go on runs either in the park or somewhere scenic, and to potentially travel together to historically significant countries and sites. For that reason, I don't feel like I'd jive very well with someone who isn't at least active and athletic.

TLDR: she doesn't need to be a 1:1 carbon copy of my physical tastes as long as I'm still physically attracted to her. Beyond that, she needs to be a decent person and a committed partner who's emotionally compatible with me, and shares compatible values enough to build a personal connection that keeps us together after physical attraction first brings us together.

CloudsTasteGeometric · 2024-06-04T19:34:58+00:00

At least 5'4" (I'm 6'7" so this is a practical matter.)
Not obese (overweight is fine, in fact I prefer chubbier women, but not obese.)
College educated (like myself)
Earns a decent salary ($45K or better - I make about twice that - in my 30s I'm basically not interested in retail workers, bartenders, or baristas. I want someone with a bit of a better foundation under them.)
Not too religious and not too conservative - but she doesn't need to be liberal or atheist, either

That's about it. I'm pretty successful and (if I'm being honest) good looking, so I can afford to be a little picky. But I'm not looking for rich women or models or anything. Just someone genuine, with a decent drive and sense of herself.

And I'm frankly very lucky that I found her.

Spread-Em-Plz · 2024-06-03T11:53:29+00:00

Here’s mine

Within a reasonable age range
Isn’t a bum (this isn’t that hard to meet tbh)
Is at least moderately active and takes fitness at least a little seriously
Doesn’t present like a hoe (this is about more than just clothing; ask if you want me to elab)
Is attracted to me (and vice versa. I suppose this is kinda obvious though)
Isn’t an incompetent fool in real life or isn’t a baby/princess (aka doesn’t completely break down the moment problems start to read their ugly-ass heads)
Sort of around my level of intelligence (I’m a dumbass; this isn’t hard to match)

I say my standards are reasonably proportionate to who I am and where I’m at in life. Being American, it actually seems like the fitness thing is one of the most difficult to meet, funnily enough!

krackedy · 2024-06-03T11:56:59+00:00

Cares about her health/body.

Cute face.

Has a career.

Kind/caring/nurturing.

Good communicator.

Confident.

Not obsessed with social media.

Curious/likes to learn new things.

Doesn't mind that I'm bisexual.

Luckily I've found this with my wife. I used to have other standards but I've realized these were the ones that truly mattered.

cast-away-ramadi06 · 2024-06-03T14:05:48+00:00

Fitness is a huge part of my life, so I want someone that shares my passion in this area.
Excellent conflict resolution skills and reasonably high EQ.
High in conscientiousness.
Wise, calm, kind, caring, & compassionate.
She must have done some kind of substantial volunteer or public-good work. This one is a big contributor to why I don't continue seeing someone. Bonus points if she served in the military or one of her parents did.
She has to be smart but also willing to do manual work around the house with me (I enjoy cooking and laundry so I also expect help with manual work). Bonus points if she was also D1 athlete.
Can't be a political or religious extremist. I have friends of various faiths and political parties, so any extremism in either of these areas won't work.
Unless she's an immigrant, we need to be approximately in the same economic situation.
Doesn't engage in gossip or character assassination. Bonus points if she's not addicted to social media.
Bonus points if she's a bit nerdy about something.
Preference for her job not involving travel (dated a few models and the travel got old).
I've dated women from around average-looking to models. As long as she's not objectively ugly and she takes good care of herself, I'm not too concerned here.

As far as my standards being too high, yes, but not because of standards related to looks.

Quiet_Firefighter_65 · 2024-06-04T02:24:16+00:00

My standards for LTR: - Attractive - Kind - Virgin - Wears modest clothing - No male friends

They are quite high, I think only a couple of women would meet them where I live.

That being said, I'm not about to lower them either.

gntlbastard · 2024-06-03T12:32:15+00:00

No single mothers
Fit and Feminine

No, I don't think it's high. I have no interest in playing daddy to someone elses kid and the women here will claim that attraction is a big part of compatibility.

Spicy_take · 2024-06-03T15:51:32+00:00

Let’s see.

Height: 5’-5’11” (I’m 6’2”, so it doesn’t really matter)

Build: Muscular, athletic, lean, thicc (not chubby), petite, and generally healthy are all welcome.

Ethnicity: White, Asian, Latina (not a deal breaker.)

Age: 18-32

Relatively pretty face.

No prior kids, but wants them.

Don’t be a hoe.

Have a job of some kind. Don’t really care what.

Matching sex drive.

Don’t be mentally ill.

Be nice, and easy to get along with.

We should make each other’s lives easier, not harder.

Weekly-Vacation-6929 · 2024-06-03T14:29:49+00:00

Just be hot/out of my league.

DoinIt989 · 2024-06-04T04:22:29+00:00

Mine are basically the same as yours (I'm also short and prefer women my height or taller) except that short hair is fine, I prefer thin over chubbier (though the bar is "not obese") and I don't care about career oriented (just has to be interesting to me personally). IMO the only that I consider somewhat unreasonable is "taller than 5'4" ", since I am only 5'6" myself

scwizard · 2024-06-04T08:30:13+00:00

A girl who can express interest gently but persistently, and who's over 18.

Here's some examples of things that didn't meet my standards. All real stories btw. A girl telling me we should do out back and I can touch her wherever I want. Too aggressive and it's gonna scare me off.

A girl talking with me a lot one time, but even though I gave her my contact info I never see her again. No persistence, I'm going to feel like I was bothering her and she's avoiding me now.

A girl repeatedly sitting next to me at the cafeteria at this church event, and making conversation... But she's 15. Yeah sorry that's not gonna happen. Also your mom is really nice and is also sitting with me, but first of all it's probably just to sit with her daughter, and second of all she hasn't mentioned her marital status and I'm not gonna bring it up cause that's awkward.

The reason it's a high standard is because women tend to prefer the the guy be the one to express interest. However there's an issue. If I were to do this with strangers, there's no risk but I'd feel like I was harassing people. If I do this with people I see often, for example a coworker, the risk of creating a awkward situation is very high unless I'm a master of reading social cues and I can tell very confidently someone is into me. I am very very not a master of reading social cues.

EDIT: I forgot another one. No grey hair. No long distance relationships. Also must have marriage as a goal of their romantic relationships. So that also excludes girls who tell me they don't believe in marriage.

pence_secundus · 2024-06-04T12:10:58+00:00

My minimum standards are:

Not fat
Easy to be with and likeable.
Will work out problems together.
Will stick around at signs of hardship or difficult times.

Basically impossible these days, I eventually found someone but I went through hundreds of women to do so.

Sargeras13 · 2024-06-04T12:43:27+00:00

Not a single mother (I am not ready to be a father yet)
Has to be single
Not plus size or obese
has to be loyal, supportive and loving
Not a psycho

GhettoJamesBond · 2024-06-03T10:26:55+00:00

not a bitch or a hoe.

has either big tits or a big ass, both is better but to be realistic I'll settle for having one of the two.

and absolutely no single moms.

Agile-Explanation263 · 2024-06-03T11:41:06+00:00

Not a sex worker, has her own appeal, has a want to grow and a capacity to put me first or get into my hobbies, loves affection

ej_theraider · 2024-06-03T16:42:49+00:00

*Born a woman *Emotionally stable (😶…) *Not a sex worker or known for being round the block *Is supportive and not a headache (this one may very well be too much to ask)

DarayRaven · 2024-06-03T10:27:42+00:00

My standards:

Good-looking

Intelligent

Academically competent

Confident in her sexuality

Genuine desire

That's it for me

GrandpaDallas · 2024-06-03T14:18:21+00:00

I like a taller woman as well, love a gal in that 5’8+ range. I want her to be active, adventurous, and not so focused on image, but rather spirit and enjoyment. I want her to be funny, intelligent, and if not career oriented at least competent. Preferably liberal and non-religious. I’d like her to be active as well.

My standards are probably high but I’ve had them met many times so I’m not worried.

TheLonerCoder · 2024-06-03T15:38:27+00:00

Depends on the type of relationship:

Short Term:

Facially attractive, good body, fun to be around, spontaneous, isn't crazy.

Long Term:

Intelligent, able to make reasonable decisions under pressure, financially literate and doesn't have debt (or very low debt), isn't crazy, and as far as looks go, she doesn't have to be that attractive but I prefer a woman who takes care of herself and works out.

I don't really care much about height for short term nor longterm. I'll date a woman whos taller than me or shorter than me.

Quad-Banned120 · 2024-06-03T16:29:07+00:00

For me they have to compete with my solitude. I'm perfectly happy and content with my alone time which I find valuable as I live an active social life regardless of my relationship status.
Some days I just don't want people around because they drain the social battery. First explanation of this I think hurt my now wife's feelings early in our relationship because she thought I didn't want her around but she's not 'people' in the way I meant that.

Concreteforester · 2024-06-03T20:42:57+00:00

Initially:

Attractive (to me). Note: I say this because I have been attracted to a variety of women in my life. I'd say that weight is important but I feel like I have a fairly normal sense of dis-like of obese people for sex.
Pleasant to be around and funny.
Similar level of respect that I give to her (pretty much a more specific addendum to "not a psycho")
Obviously attracted to me. I am specifically done with women who act aloof and put the majority of sexual work on the man.

For long-term relationships:

Has a job and is not a loser. Also does not have a high-stress job that takes up 90% of her time (I think that is a fair requirement, can't have a traditional relationship if you're gone all the time. Friends with benefits is fine in that case, but not long-term) EDIT: can't believe I need to put this in here but does not have a job involved in sex work, drug work or ... abducting virgins for satanic sacrifices (jesus, just don't be doing shit that brings men with guns around and we're fine)
Similar age
Okay with not being married
No young children
Not just out of a divorce (like a couple years at least)
Able to discuss and resolve disagreements respectfully and lovingly
Does not make her happiness solely my responsibility.
Genuinely appreciates what I bring to her life and proves that making my life better is a similar priority to her (basically, reciprocity)

I'm middle-aged and looks have always been important, but not primary to me. I strongly dislike people who rely on their looks and are shit to be around...

abaxeron · 2024-06-03T23:07:34+00:00

Bear minimum (badumtss): No incurable STIs. At least one functioning hand. At least one working eye. Not completely asexual/anorgasmic.

Strongly desirable: no criminal record, no children, no crazy exes, no crazy relatives, no "sex work", can walk by herself.

Desirable: not a state servant / enforcer (military, justice, whatever), not deaf / mute, no severe cosmetic defects.

Depending on the positives, I think everything else is workable.

I don't consider my standards too high; I think with the exception of "not a state servant / enforcer", I cover the vast majority of female population.

Sure_Tourist1088 · 2024-06-03T10:16:59+00:00

Hits the gym a couple of times a week.
intelligent and well-read enough to not be an embarrassment.
Dresses like a woman not a streetwalker or hip hop star.
Is generally pleasant to be around.
Doesn’t think short men are subhuman.

Apparently these are astronomical.

Salt_Alternative_86 · 2024-06-03T10:57:15+00:00

Focusing on looks is bad because it's judgemental? What!?! If men don't find them attractive, they have every right to exercise their own judgement and nope out. Nobody gets to determine whose standards are problematic. Frankly, that shit is borderline rapey. No means no, doesn't matter why.

Doesthisevenmatter7 · 2024-06-03T11:32:30+00:00

If she’s pretty and shorter than me I’ll usually atleast give her a chance. From then on it’s just all about the personality and the vibe. She doesn’t have to be rail thin I like nice hips and big breast and typically that comes with a little extra weight so I’m cool with that. Obese girls are not for me, and when it comes to dating doesn’t matter how hot they are if they get on my nerves I’m out.

I’m more of a loner career driven person, so the majority of time I spend studying and working. I have to really like you to enjoy spending time with you to take away from my alone time. No kids single mothers are an absolute no. I don’t want the responsibility of a child until I feel that I am in that stage of life. I also prefer blonde hair but that’s more of a preference than a requirement.

Maffioze · 2024-06-03T14:00:53+00:00

Being a kind and genuine person.

Average or above average intelligence.

Enjoys deep conversation about philosophy, science, art, emotions, etc

Shows interests in my hobbies and interests

Doesn't yell easily and is not emotionally abusive

No overly impulsive behaviour

Identifies neither as a feminist, nor as a traditionalist/conservative

Sees sex as something inherently connected to love just like I do

Open-minded about pretty much everything

Confident enough to tell me when I fucked up and made a mistake, humble enough to admit when she made a mistake.

Mature enough to understand people make mistakes and that no one knows how to do everything perfectly, neither me nor her.

Wants an approximately equal relationship where teamwork is key

Accepts my vulnerability and doesn't make my unfortunately rather large amount of trauma about her

Cares a lot about physical touch

Not obese

Libido atleast average, doesn't lean towards being asexual

Accepts that I have some more feminine sides to me than the average man

I think my standards are quite high when it comes to character, but I have already found her and I think I mostly meet my own standards.

Tywinlol · 2024-06-03T10:19:12+00:00

I want someone in the same tax bracket as me. Intelligent, capable of maintaining conversation, able of disagreeing rationally and politely, without being disagreeable, not afraid to speak her mind, willing to listen to the point of view she disagrees with. Also I want someone kind and loyal. It's okay is she is overweight, but not obese, must not subscribe to body positivity movement. If we going to live together I will expect her to cook and clean, and split costs. I'm not interested in children and marriage so she should be okay with that. And obviously we should be sexually compatible.

Edit: Forgot to mention that I would also appreciate if she didn't drink, smoke and avoided drugs. And if she abused any of those it would be a deal breaker. Also not a feminist. Bonus points if she speaks multiple languages and we share hobbies.

FirmQuarter6623 · 2024-06-03T12:01:41+00:00

Heigh doesn't really matter. I think I like short women more, but somehow I always end up dating tall ones (5'9 - 5'11). I'm 6'0.

NOT FAT. I prefer pork in my plate, not in the bed.

30 yo>

Quiet calm voice. Never scream

No previous history of abuse. When I hear a woman say her ex was threatening acid her face or something like that, it's instant no.

No kids

Not a divorcee.

Brilliant_Island8498 · 2024-06-03T11:07:38+00:00

Focus on looks, don’t be fooled women are superficial. Even the good ones are

If u look good, she will give you a lot of passes

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AfterDarkOpinions · 2024-06-03T11:44:18+00:00

I wouldn't say my standards are that high.

For a long-term relationship:

No children
Not religious and politically liberal/left-leaning
Preferably no tattoos/piercings other than ears
Between 10-30% body fat (I'm referencing this chart)
Preferably a woman of color (Black, Asian, etc.)
Is sex positive
Dresses well (loves pumps/stilettos, dresses, etc.)
Has a warm, kindhearted demeanor

There are some other traits that are nice-to-haves, but that's mainly it.

Tobor_Xes240 · 2024-06-03T13:08:01+00:00

My standards are exactly what I bring to the table: - no pre-existing children - reasonable amount of debt (mortgage) - a job - sub 25 27 BMI (I’ve leaned out to ~20 but I don’t like skinny bitches) - enjoys going to concerts

As others have pointed out, these sort of checklists offend women because I’m not Chad and therefore, I should simply be satisfied with anyone who deigns talk to me and possesses two X chromosomes.

Attraction cannot be negotiated.

Is only applicable to homely heterosexual men.

SilentFroggy · 2024-06-03T16:01:25+00:00

-Puts effort into the relationship (the average man doesn’t receive this)

-Attractive (I find many women physically attractive if they work on themselves)

-Low bodycount (0 bodycount is ideal)

I never thought of my standards being high until learning about modern women

Anti_Thing · 2024-06-03T18:00:54+00:00

I wouldn't date or marry a woman I'm not physically attracted to.

I wouldn't marry a woman who isn't a theologically conservative Protestant, doesn't agree that the man should be the head of the household, doesn't want kids, or has political views I consider to be extreme (Nazi, Communist, thinks abortion should be legal, &c.). I'm open to dating a woman who doesn't meet these standards but is willing to change, though we wouldn't last if she doesn't end up changing her views. For example, I might date a woman who recently started attending a theologically conservative Protestant church but isn't fully converted to that belief system yet, but I wouldn't marry her until she converts, & if she doesn't convert within a couple of years I'd break up with her.

Other than that, I have no total deal breakers.

I'd strongly prefer a woman who:

-is Charismatic or Pentecostal (believes in prophecy, speaking in tongues, getting "slain in the spirit", &c.),

-is ethnically Hungarian,

-wants at least 4 kids, wants to be a housewife, & is ready to get married & start pumping out babies ASAP,

-is 25 or younger,

-is introverted & autistic,

-is strongly right-wing on social issues (monarchist, pro-gun, anti-abortion, anti-modern-sex-ed, anti-gay marriage, anti-marijuana, pro-Israel, anti illegal immigration or mass immigration, &c.) & is strongly hateful towards both the China/Russia bloc of countries & to contemporary Western progressivism,

-is a virgin with no tattoos or piercings (except for earrings & a ring in one nostril, those are cool),

-is the bookish/intellectual type,

though none of these are necessarily deal breakers.

I tend to be most attracted to women who have olive skin, dark hair, & big noses (think relatively pale women from West Asia & North Africa, or relatively dark women from East Europe, South Europe, & in some cases Latin America), though I'm open to non-obese women who don't fit this type.

I think that my standards are extremely high for my area, & I'm likely going to end up moving to find a wife or else marrying an immigrant or transplant from a more conservative place.

kongeriket · 2024-06-03T18:09:38+00:00

When I was dating for de facto marriage I had standards that were quite high for certain circles/types of females.

On the physical side, I don't think I was (or still am) being unreasonable: Weigh less than 80kg but more than 55kg (I prefer curvy/slightly overweight), be taller than 150cm but no more than 180cm and between the ages of 18 and 27-28 (if older, be willing to have a child very fast). No serious mental health issues (e.g. schizophrenia, BPD, etc.) or serious hereditary congenital diseases ('cause I wanted children). Oh, and no STDs, thank you very much.

Much higher I'm with the values:

not vegan
not leftist
antifeminist
pro-life
de facto Orthodox values on child rearing
likes traveling [preferably have a gig of her own that involves such a lifestyle]
preferably a metalhead though not a dealbreaker [my wife is, though]
has a knack for foreign languages and high-level wisdom and curiosity [I speak 14 languages]
religiously promiscuous [de facto atheist is fine, but antitheist is a deal breaker]
sex positive [or at least being willing to learn - deal breaker if not]
regards sex as a duty just like I do [deal breaker if not]
low preference for social media narcissism [I legit feel blessed that my wife fits this one, it's so hard to find such a person these days]
likes guns [my wife falls short on this one]
has a decent relationship with her parents
very low on jealousy [you either trust me or you don't]

It took several years to find such a person but I did 16 years ago and have been living a better life thanks to her.

There are also irrelevant aspects that (some) on this sub care a lot but I didn't: Such as body count (I had a very high one) or her job or her income (we were both poor when we got together - now I make more in a week than she makes in a year) or what school she went/would go (I genuinely dgaf).

For a while I believed that my standards were too high. I had no problem attracting women, but couldn't quite stay too much in a relationship. Overwhelmingly it was the jealousy part that put me off. I rejected the feminine advice that jealousy is somehow "good" and "a sign that she's really into you" and applied TRP. That helped me weed out the nonsense faster.

purplish_possum · 2024-06-03T19:30:25+00:00

IQ of at least 130
At least a 4 year college degree
Has a decent job or business
Not a religious wackjob
Not conservative
Booty at least 50 inches

Everything else is negotiable.

wtknight · 2024-06-03T14:37:12+00:00

Someone who is at least cute, has a pleasant personality, and who I can have intelligent conversations with. I also like somewhat modest women with non-promiscuous pasts.

I don’t think that my standards are high at all.

AstronautExisting230 · 2024-06-03T15:18:39+00:00

i dont care anymore. I've moved on and im content with being single. I used to however like thin women, more artsy, and into traveling.

Agile-Explanation263 · 2024-06-03T20:38:24+00:00

I don't ever want to be a stereotype of the husband or boyfriend who gets made fun of or is held to having to be greatful i even have a woman in my life.

Contrapuntobrowniano · 2024-06-04T00:36:42+00:00

Not preferring bears over men. Liking sex. Being honest. Being reciprocative. Passes the attraction test. Yup. The perfect girl.

These are high standards, because women tend to be fearlessly dishonest nowadays (everybody, to be fair), and don't like reciprocating a litle bit.

his_purple_majesty · 2024-06-04T01:38:50+00:00

Mine are quite high, although picky is probably a better word, since I don't think they align with most guys.

Could not care less about sexual history, occupation, education (but intelligence is of the utmost importance).

Alfred-Adler · 2024-06-04T02:12:51+00:00

I have been told that focusing on looks is bad, because that is judgmental, and that other standards I have are not ok to have (educated, ambitious).

I am married now, but when I was single I had similar standard, I simply wanted someone who brought to the table more or less what I was bringing. And - just like you - I was told that my standards were too high.

I didn't listen, I persevered, I dated my more than fair share of women, mostly casually/FWB. And then I married an incredible woman that met all of my standards and then some.

There are objectively great women out there, and they have a problem: they can't find a great guy.

Great women and great guys are a small minority IMO.

saywhatitis11 · 2024-06-04T02:22:26+00:00

I have sex standards and relationship standards. Relationship: kind, self sufficient emotionally, not sad or pessimistic (sex ok, relationship no). sex when she’s a little heavier ok, like 5’3” size 8 or 10 is ok depending on how she wears it, not for a relationship. I have a limit for selfishness for both, the sex it’s a higher limit. Past or current Sex work like OF or stripper ok for sex with tests, not for relationship. I prefer a fun girl but boring is fine for sex I don’t care about religion for either, I’m atheist, and in a relationship I’d attend her church sometimes. Hard no on Muslim faith or anything culty like Mormon 7th adventists or Jehovahs Witnesses. If she wants to be catholic that’s cool with me. Hard no on relationship with blue haired feminist but those girls are so liberated sexually they’re super easy to get in the sack. Age gap is fine but she needs to be old enough to know what we’re doing. If she’s a very innocent 22, and she’s going to get her heart broken, I won’t. There no pride in that. If she’s 22, happy to play around, I will.

TRTGymBro1 · 2024-06-03T11:24:17+00:00

She has to be a 9 or a 10. PhD in sucking dick. Not annoying. Not clingy. Wants to fuck twice a day. Has hot girlfriends and enjoys threesomes. Can deepthroat. Has her own career and interests. Believes in honesty, trust and respect. Never says a cross word to me.

AnalSexIsTheBest8-- · 2024-06-03T13:10:24+00:00

Around my height (183 cm)
Physically attractive to me
Masculine personality characteristics
Reasonable and open-minded
Aligning values and at least some interests
Willing to compromise without escalating into fights
Takes my desires, opinions, reputation and well-being into consideration

berichorbeburied · 2024-06-03T13:17:34+00:00

Rn I was waiting for my bestfriend.

But after my workouts produce results. I’m going to start pursuing other women.

Thicc/curves/top heavy
Sexually attractive
Younger than me
Shorter than me (I’m 6’2 - 6’4)

Ultramega39 · 2024-06-03T13:32:49+00:00

Yes

I made a whole list but a lot of the points don't actually matter that much because the list itself is meant to indicate how much i like someone on an objective scale. I'm only going to list the things that I put in the "very important" category:

● Loyal/empathetic, kind.

● Doesn’t smoke, vape, or do drugs.

● Similar age as I am (18-23)

● Is sexually inexperienced or is also a virgin.

● Very ambitious, has a lot of goals and dreams that she wants to accomplish.

● Wants to eventually have children.

● Isn't a Athiest.

● Is a introvert

● Is intelligent and is willing to discuss elaborate topics with a open mind

==================================================================≈======

And then for physical appearance there's really only 2 things worth mentioning:

● Is white (this isn't a requirement)

● Has a similar body size as I do (skinny or fit)

Are my standards high? Yes. Do I think that it's unrealistic? no, because I've actually met a few people who pretty much check almost every box.

The_Forgotten001 · 2024-06-03T14:54:24+00:00

For a wife: these are non-negotiable

Has to be into gaming

has an affable personality

enjoys my cooking

Cleans up after herself (honestly if you just pick up after yourself cleaning isn't even an issue)

wants 3+ kids

Edit#1 hmm looking at the list... I might as well date a female streamer

kvakerok_v2 · 2024-06-03T16:33:05+00:00

Not a sex worker

Not a hoe (single digit partner count)

Has a job

Younger than 35

Not obese, but a little chub is ok, preferable even.

Not a psycho

Not a single mother

Knows how to cook more than Kraft Dinner and "Rice'n'Chicken".

Knows how to budget. I earn a lot and would rather not see my money wasted.

Does not have identity built around a single issue (don't care which way they're leaning).

Above shoe size IQ. I'm a mensa bitch so need someone capable of having a conversation with me.

MalePsychopath · 2024-06-03T12:12:08+00:00

pretty face (7+)
skinny and great proportions
not taller than 6 feet
younger than 25
virgin
IQ at least one standard deviation above the mean
excellent hygiene and always smells good
rich but frugal
good work ethic and doesn’t mind getting her hands dirty
kind and empathetic
patient
altruistic
integrous
caring and supportive
agreeable
respectful
open-minded, creative and curious
loves learning and science
centrist political opinions
not a feminist
doesn’t want to get married
loves children and is good at taking care of them
doesn’t believe in stupid shit like astrology
loves cooking and cleaning
no trauma and has never been assaulted
good communication skills
good at finding compromises and settling arguments
doesn’t hold grudges
no disabilities or health problems
no personality disorders
no mental health problems
neurotypical
high sex drive, kinky and submissive
artistic talent
atheist
no ugly tattoos
no crazy family
long hair and dresses classy
no body hair
short nails
minimal makeup
likes animals and treats them well
great sense of humor
pleasant, feminine voice
large nipples
optimistic
humble (not arrogant, entitled or narcissistic)
not hypergamous
not overly insecure and doesn’t need a lot of reassurance
low neuroticism
doesn’t gossip
not a cheater
not jealous
male vulnerability doesn’t give her the ick
has never done any kind of sex work or sent nudes to someone
good driver and likes driving
not verbally or physically abusive
doesn’t drink or smoke
no male friends (brothers are ok)

boom-wham-slam · 2024-06-03T12:20:29+00:00

Not fat.

Either a virgin OR is ok with one sided open relationship. (No hymen no diamond)

Significantly younger than me.

Short and petite.

Long hair.

Pleasant/submissive/caring

Don't give a fuck about job or education.

Ok-Dust-4156 · 2024-06-03T12:28:41+00:00

She must share my interests, be capable of supporting herself and love sex. And I found one many years ago, didn't look at another women since.

CraftyCooler · 2024-06-03T10:12:32+00:00

I am not dating since i'm married but my standards were pretty high:

pretty face
no tattoos
not bisexual
not left-wing
not feminist
no mental health issues
educated
has job
not from broken home(not divorced parents, no alcoholism/violence at home, no growing up in poverty)
not vegetarian/vegan
not 'spritual'
not too much sexual partners(above 5 in 20s is a red flag)
knows how to live on her own(not that obvious, plenty of women didn't know how to make some basic meal or use the washing machine - mommy was doing everything for them).

Title	Men of PPD, what are your standards? Do you think they are high?
Author	No_Assistance1532
Upvotes	51
Comments	428
Date	June 3, 2024 9:58 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1d70qgc/men_of_ppd_what_are_your_standards_do_you_think/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/men-of-ppd-what-are-your-standards-do-you-think.1520417 https://theredarchive.com/post/1520417

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